I would like to clarify some things but at this moment there is no clarity. Simple but true statement. This song is playing as I write..Love Hurts by Nazareth.Love does hurt, it also lifts you up, inspires you, makes you want great things and pushes you to reach for the stars.
I can only write as I go along on this journey of mine and watch the story unfold just as you do. I have much to do yet. Growing up, I imagined a home filled with a family, a happy family. A family that supported one another, that stayed together, laughed together and cried together.
The next part of my journey may have its twist and turns that lead me to melancholy. I welcome this. I know what I have searched for may not exist and I am prepared to accept that. It also doesn't stop me from exploring the possibilities.
What are you searching for? If you are looking for money, stop your search now. Money doesn't bring happiness. If you are looking for devotion, look inward and rely on yourself. When you have reached clarity, things will fall into place. Things may begin to fall into place even before you realize it is happening.
When the dust has settled and you open your eyes to see calm....you have attained the very dream you thought would always escape you. This is the clarification I am working towards. Past that, I can not know what I want or what life will bring.
Each time I begin to imagine how life would be or what I wish for, life takes a turn and my path to what I desire is made longer. Quite possibly my life will be like the recurring dream I had for many, many years.
In this dream, I am in a town with dirt roads-just one road that I can see. On each side of the road that I walk slowly down are houses that appear almost identical. They look like plain box houses built around 1950 and I am walking from door to door trying to open them. I never find an open door and I continue on to the last house that sits facing me at the end of this dead end street.
I never reach this last house. On the porch of this house is a figure, a person. I never get to meet this person. Instead, I walk endlessly.....
On the beach
My toes must always enter the water.
About Me
- Finding Abigail
- I have been lost a few times but never for long. I always find my way back home, to the very heart of me. This is the story of "finding Abigail". Abigail was the childhood name I gave myself. She was a dreamer, a lover of life and believed in the magic of love. She wished on stars and reached for the moon even when no one lifted her up. I once told myself I would not lose myself to a man but I did. I once told myself I would never find love but I did. I am still waiting to see who sticks around forever....This is my personal journey, thank you for joining me.
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